Walking with me all this time

I was reminded of something I had forgotten today. I had an appointment with my psychiatrist this morning and I was incredibly frustrated. My anxiety has been really high this month, not really the result I was hoping from the new med I switched at the beginning of the month. I was dreading yet another doctor's appointment with no change, no results, stuck in the quagmire of a mind that won't stop, stress that won't diminish, anxiety that won't leave. I was mentally banging my head against a wall as I was driving, frustrated beyond belief, wondering what in the world it would take to FIX me! Where was that magic pill that would make it all better?! Then a song came on the radio. It's a new one "All This Time" by Britt Nicole. I'd never heard before. It's not particularly well-written or catchy, but today, it was EXACTLY what I needed. As the words flowed from the speakers, they went straight to my heart. I posted them below so you can read them. "You've been walking with me all this time." See, in my frustration, I forgot that life with God isn't about being perfect. It isn't about never getting sick, never hurting, never falling. It's about the journey, the relationship we have with our Creator. Today, I am medically no closer to freedom from the anxiety that I feel robs so much of my life. But I am reminded that as I walk through this, good days, bad days and all the days in between, He's right there with me and that makes it all okay. Not easy, but okay.



Thank You, Lord, for the blessing of Your presence in my life. Thank You for the days like today when I can just climb up on Your lap and just be. I can't give You anything today. I don't have it. I'm tired, I'm sick and I'm fresh out of "oomph". But I thank You because You love me just the same. Thank You for not being a fair-weather God. I am blown away today by the extent of Your love, Your acceptance, Your grace. Thank You for being my Daddy.

 

ALL THIS TIME

By Britt Nicole

I remember the moment
I remember the pain
I was only a girl
But I grew up that day
Tears were falling
I know You saw me

Hiding there in my bedroom
So alone
I was doing my best
Trying to be strong
No one to turn to
That's when I met You

All this time
From the first tear cry
To today's sunrise
And every single moment between
You were there
You were always there
It was You and I
You've been walking with me all this time

Ever since that day
it's been clear to me
That no matter what comes
You will never leave
I know You're for me
And You're restoring

Every heartache and failure
Every broken dream
You're the God who sees
The God who rescued me
This is my story
This is my story

I hear these people asking me
How do I know what I believe?
Well I'm not the same me
And I saw the proof I need
I felt Love I felt Your grace
You stole my heart that day